Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.
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Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?
It's a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight
begins!
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Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.
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It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged.
It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.
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It is difficult to understand GOD.
He makes such beautiful things as women and then he turns them into
Wives.
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Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about
something you
say.
After marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish.
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There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic
banking.
It's called marriage.
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Girlfriends r like chocolates, taste good anytime.
Lovers r like PIZZAS, Hot n spicy, eaten frequently.
Husbands r like Dal RICE, eaten when there's no choice.
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Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated?
Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.
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Prospective husband: Do you have a book called 'Man, The Master of
Women'?
Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.
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There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so much that he
would go through hell for her.
They got married and now he is going thru hell.
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Fact of life: One woman brings you into this world crying & the other
ensures you continue to do so for the rest of your life!
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Q: Why doesn't law permit a man to marry a second woman?
A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same
offence!
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Friday, July 13, 2007
Jokes
1. What is Common between : Krishna, Ram, Gandhiji & Jesus..?
Sardar ji Replied : All are Born on Government Holidays.
2. Teacher to a Sardar : A==B, B==C, So A==C, Give me an example,
Sardar : I Love You, You Love Your Daughter,! So I Love Your
Daughter.
3. Ek aadmi ki Biwi gum ho gayi, Waha RAM ke Mandir me gaya,
Ram ne kaha Baju wale Hanuman Ke Mandir mai ja, Meri bhi usi ne
dhundhi thi.
4. A Kid asks the Priest : Father what is your Favourite Pastime...?
The Priest pats the kids head & replys : NUN My Child NUN....!!
5. Sardar bought a new mobile. He called everyone from his Phone
Book & said "My Mobile No. has changed Earlier it was Nokia 3310
Now it is 6610"
6. Santa : I am a Proud Sardar, My son is in Medical College,
Banta : Really, what is he studing, Santa : No is not studying,
they r Studying him.
7. Chinti aur Hathi ka Prem Vivah hua. Agle Din Hathi ki Maut ho
gai...!! Chinti Boli Wah Mohabbat, EK din ka pyar hua, ab sari
umra kabra khodne mai bitegi..!!
8. Santa Banta ko 3 live bomb mile, Police ko dene chale, Santa agar
koi bomb raste mai Phat jaye to..?
Banta : Jhooth bol denge 2 hi mile the...!!!
9. Sardar falls in Love with Nurse. He writes a Loveletter to her, "
I LOVE U SISTER."
http://gmail.com
A little girl walked daily to and from school.
Though weather this particular morning was questionable and clouds forming, she made her trek to the elementary school.
As the afternoon progressed, the winds whipped up, along with thunder and lightning.
The child's mother, concerned that her daughter would be frightened and possibly harmed by the storm got into her car and drove along the route to her
child's school.
As she did so, she saw her little daughter walking along happily but at each flash of lightning she would stop, look up & smile.
Stopping car, mother called to
child to get in with her. As they drove toward school, the girl continued to turn toward each lightning flash and smile.
The Mother asked, "What are you doing?"
The child answered, "Well, I must do this,
God keeps taking pic of me."
Sunday, July 8, 2007
Two traveling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a wealthy family.The family was rude and refused to let the angels stay in the mansion's guest room. Instead the angels were given a space in the cold basement.As they made their bed on the hard floor, the older angel saw a hole in the wall and repaired it. When the younger angel asked why, the older angel replied... " Things aren't always what they seem".The next night the pair came to rest at the house of a very poor, but very hospitable farmer and his wife.After sharing what little food they had the couple let the angels sleep in their bed where they could have a good night's rest. When the sun came up the next morning the angels found the farmer and his wife in tears. Their only cow, whose milk had been their sole income, lay dead in the field.The younger angel was infuriated and asked the older angel "how could you have let this happen!? The first man had everything, yet you helped him," she accused. "The second family had little but was willing to share everything, and you let their cow die.""Things aren't always what they seem ," the older angel replied. "When we stayed in the basement of the mansion, I noticed there was gold stored in that hole in the wall.Since the owner was so obsessed with greed and unwilling to share his good fortune, I sealed the wall so he wouldn't find it. Then last night as we slept in the farmers bed, the angel of death came for his wife. I gave her the cow instead. Things aren't always what they seem."*********Sometimes this is exactly what happens when things don't turn out the way they should. If you have faith , you just need to trust that every outcome is always to your advantage. You might not know it until some time later.
Seasons of life.... "A Poem"
Swirling leaves, the earth grows still awaiting its time of sleep. The skies turn grey. The time grows short. The birds take to the sky on retreat.The snow falls from the heavens above. The wind becomes blustery and cold. The sun shines on the blankets of snow reflecting hues to gold.The rain comes down and torrents. Little petals of green appear. The earth bursts forth in color a time that spring is near.The sun shines gloriously above the earth. The grass is full and green. The fields are full of flowers as far as the eye can see.Each season is a creation of a part of a continuous link. A time of birth and renewal to a time of reprieve and sleep.God has given us this earth as a special gift. A promise from him above. That our lives should never become mundane and in God we should trust and love.Make each day that you live a memorable one. Leave your signature behind. Reach out and touch the heart of a loved one. Visit a friend in need. Take the time.When you enter in to the heavenly gates. When your time on earth is done. When your seasons have now passed away God will say enter my little one.For when your life is over what will you have left behind? The memories of your patience and love passed on eternally throughout all mankind.
